Giant fucking robots;need I say more?

If you were a child of the 80's, such as myself, then you probably have fond memories of hauling ass to get home after school so that you could watch the latest episode of one of the most popular cartoons of the time: Transformers. For those of you who weren't so fortunate, let me go ahead and give you the backstory. The Transformers were a race of giant robots who hailed from a distant planet called Cybertron, and they had the ability to transform their bodies into various vehicles. They were divided into two factions;the benevolent Autobots and the nefarious Decepticons. For years, these two sides fought each other over an energy resource called Energon, an energy source that was running very short in supply. They set out to find alternate forms of energy, and wound up taking their fight to planet Earth, where they configured their bodies to transform into earthbound vehicles, giving them the ability to blend in. The cartoon spawned an incredibly profitable toy line which emptied the wallets of many parents, mine included. In 1986, a full length animated film hit theaters, but was a financial failure. Many of the show's main characters were killed off early in the movie to make way for new ones, and pretty much sent the franchise on the downslide. There have been several incarnations of the show, but nothing has ever come close to matching the popularity of the original.





For years, the idea of a live action Transformers film has been tossed around, but only now does the technology to do this type of movie justice exist. When word first broke that a new Transformers film would hit theaters in 2007, a very big smile made its way across my face. That smile got even bigger when I found out that Michael Bay would be the director. Few directors in Hollywood have the ability to polarize an audience like Michael Bay. Survey enough people and you'll find that most either love the product that he puts forth or they think that he is the antichrist of modern cinema. Whatever you think about Bay, the one thing you can't deny is that, when it comes to big time action sequences, he delivers like no other, and this is the type of movie that he was born to do. Steven Spielberg being brought on as executive producer was just icing on the cake.



Transformers has made its way into theaters and wastes no time hitting the ground running. The film's opening salvo is a devestating attack on an air force base in the Middle East, courtesy of the Decepticon known as Blackout, who manages to infiltrate the base under the guise of a military helicopter. Most people have probably seen bits and pieces of this scene in trailers and TV spots, but to the see the full thing is truly a magnificant sight. From there, the movie starts focusing on the central human character, Sam Witwicky(Shia LeBoeuf). Sam is your typical high school student who has his eye on a certain girl named Mikaela(Megan Fox) and is trying to purchase a car in hopes of wooing said strumpet. He purchases a beat up 1979 yellow Camaro that seems to have a mind of its own. He later finds out that his car has a few more options than he originally thought;the car is actually an Autobot named Bumblebee. It turns out that Sam is in possession of an item that shows the location to an energy source called the Allspark, and both the Autobots and Decepticons are looking for it. This item is the key to deciding the fate of the planet. The Autobots are determined to protect Sam and the Decepticons will stop at nothing to obtain this item. There are other subplots going on as well;a group of soldiers who have survived the attack on their base are trying to get back to Washington to tell what happened, and a covert government agency, led by Agent Simmons(a hilariously over the top John Tuturro) has plans of their own for our interstellar visitors. All of these plots come together for a climatic battle in downtown Los Angeles that is truly an assault on the senses.



The design team at Industrial Light and Magic was charged with the responsibility of bringing these metallic behemoths to life, and they did quite an excellent job at it. Lots of criticism was levied at Michael Bay for some of the design changes that he implemented, but those changes were well warranted. The simple, blocky designs of the cartoon just would not have translated into a film of this scope, and everyone involved should be commended on how realistic these robots look on screen. The transformations are smooth and fluid, and you never really get the feeling that you're looking at CGI. Not only do the robots look the part, but just like the cartoon, they have the added touch of personality. A major coup was pulled when Peter Cullen was signed on to provide the voice of Optimus Prime as he did in the cartoon for so many years. Cullen lends a degree of familiarity for fans who grew up on the cartoon, and even though his voice has changed slightly over the years, he still is able to get the job done. The other Autobots have their own styles as well: Ironhide is the trigger happy one who is itching to shoot something, Jazz is the "hip" one(for lack of a better term), and Ratchet shows geunine concern as the chief mechanic for his fellow comrades. Bumblebee is unable to speak due to an injury, but he communicates through his stereo, and he's able to bond with Sam, much like he did in the cartoon. The scene where the Autobots are trying to hide outside Sam's house while he searches for his glasses provides a nice touch of humor to balance out the action. On the flipside, most of the dialouge from the Decepticons comes from their leader Megatron, and Hugo Weaving was a welcome change for this character. He gives Megatron a sense of arrogance that carries over very well from the cartoon. The only complaint I have in that department is that, with the exception of a couple of lines, there's not much back and forth between Megatron and Starscream, who was always plotting to usurp Megatron as the leader of the group. In the cartoon, Megatron always had to put Starscream in his place, and he really didn't get a chance to do that much in the film.

In the days leading up to the premiere, I had the opportunity(or misfortune, depending on how you look at it) to check out different blog that were full of fanboy hate for the direction that this movie took. There were all kinds of complaints about all kinds of details: the flame paint job on Prime, the fact the his mouth was visible, the decision to make Bumblebee a Camaro instead of a VW Bug, etc etc. It's hard to imagine anybody making any huge complaints once they see the film. I give it 4 stars.